Wednesday 11 December 2013

100 GREATEST MOVIE VILLAINS

Pt. 7  31-35

O'BRIEN
Who's he?: O'Brien is a senior official of the INGSOC party ruling Oceania in 1984. He is part of the ruling class known as the Inner Party, and, as such, he has several discretionary powers over everything and everyone.
How bad is he?: 6079 Smith W. unbellyful ingsoc. Thoughtcrime doubleplus ungood. Sexcrime doubleplus ungood. Ref: 6079 Smith W. unperson. Ref: 6079 Smith W. Room 101.
What happened?: Oceania is at war with Eastasia. Oceania has always been at war with Eastasia.
Appearance: 1984 (1984)

THE BLACK KNIGHT

Who's he?: Somewhere in Medieval England there was a bridge. A bridge guarded by this here Black Knight. No one knows why he guarded that bridge, or who put him there in the first place. His orders were very clear, though: none shall pass!
How bad is he?: The Black Knight is a loony, that much is certain. Hack his limbs off, and he'll keep coming at ya, bleeding on your tabard and chainmail. As everyone knows, getting blood stains off your clothes is a nightmare. Plus, even reduced to a torso, the Black Knight won't even grant you victory. He's one hell of a sore loser.
What happened?: The Black Knight may have killed many a good knight trying to cross the bridge, however Arthur, king of the Britons, is no mere knight. A mere tap of that Excalibur of his and you've become the poster child for war amputees. Ask the Black Knight, not that he'd admit it of course...
Appearance: Monty Python and the Holy Grail (1974)

AGENT SMITH

Who's he?: Agent Smith is not an actual person. Rather, he's a computer program designed to operate inside the Matrix, an elaborate computer simulation designed to resemble the real world ca. 1999. His main task is to hunt down and terminate human beings who have escaped from the Matrix and use illegal download privilieges to hack themselves back into the Matric and wreak havok and mayhem.
How bad is he?: Well, here's the deal: Agent Smith is not a human being. He's a computer program working inside another computer program, and thus he is unburdened by the normal laws of physics. In short, he is super strong, super fast and can download copies of himself inside everyone still hooked into the Matrix. Plus he hates human beings.
What happened?: Everyone knows computers get viruses from time to time, and everyone knows viruses do funny things to a computer. So you can guess that, if Agent Smith behaved like a computer virus, then things started to get bad for everybody. In the ends, the Machines and Human beings made an alliance to stop this bastard, using Neo as their resident super hero.
Appearances: The Matrix (1999), The Matrix Reloaded (2003), The Matrix Revolutions (2003)


MORGAN LE FEY

Who's she?: She is the daughter of the Duke of Cornwall and his wife Ygraine. One day, King Uther Pendragon had the hots for her mother, so he told his friend Merlin to make him appear as the good Duke so he could bang her. In return, Uther promised to give the child back to Merlin. That child was Arthur, future King of Britain and Morgan's half-brother.
How bad is she?: Driven by revenge for what happened to her Mom, Morgan ingratiated herself to Merlin so she could learn his magick. That she did and she used it to appear as Arthur's estranged wife Guinevere and bed him, giving birth to Arthur's son and nephew Mordred. Oh, and when she was done with Merlin, she trapped him in ice deep inside her lair.
What happened?: Merlin is not the sort of person to be upstaged by a mere apprentice. He eventually escaped and literally sucked the breath out of her, so Morgan aged from a ripe young woman to an old crone in a matter of seconds. Ouch!
Appearance: Excalibur (1981)

BIFF TANNEN

Who's he?: Resident bully and douchebag of Hill Valley, California who made the life of the McFly family a living hell. Until, that is, Marty McFly went back in time and taught his future Dad a thing or two about self-respect.
How bad is he?: It's easy to dismiss Tannen as just a simple asshole, like many others but see he got hold of this book about every outcome of every game of baseball for the last 50 years and he gave it to his younger self, somehow. Using it to bet on every game made Tannen a very rich man, so, in an alternate time-line of the year 2017, Tannen owned Hill Valley and turned it into Gangsta Paradise, killing George McFly and marrying his widow, Lorraine (Marty's Mom if you recall).
What happened? Succesfully betting on sports events does not make you intelligent, just lucky. And Biff is just one dumb jock regurlarly getting creamed by a McFly in the past, present and future of Hill Valley.
Appearances: The Back to the Future trilogy (1985-1990)

No comments:

Post a Comment